So I'm sitting on toilet, as one does, pondering about random stuff and my brain locks on to the word relationships. That got me started on friendships.
Friendships have always been a tricky thing for me. I don't easily make them, because I don't easily trust, but when I do I give my everything. Like most things in my life if I do something I do it all out. "Go big or go home".
I started thinking about the really profound friendships I have had in my life. Those which are now lost and those who still remain.
The longest one is with one of my closest friends. One of the roots in the tree of my life. We have been friends for over 15 years. There have been ups and downs. Major ones, but still loyalty remains. I suppose it stems from us both being outcasts. One of the peculiarities of our friendship is that we can go weeks without speaking with or seeing each other and yet when we do it is like no time has passed at all. We recently went through a period of 6 months without speaking and yet when we spoke after that it was like we were the two nerds again back in high school talking a whole bunch of rubbish and laughing our heads off at out silly stupid jokes only we understand. That is a true friendship.
I have a sneaky way of measuring the depth of my friendships. I believe that if you can sit in silence with someone without being uncomfortable at all then you have a true friend at your side. I have made a lot of people uncomfortable by doing this and was fun seeing them squirm in the silence but try as I might they never turned out to be good friends at all.
Another is one I consider to be one of my best friends. We shall call her "Grace Adler". We knew each other for a while before we became friends. Funnily enough I can't really recall how our friendship started but one thing I know for sure is that I do not think that it is gonna end soon. She is one of the most real people I have ever met and one of the strongest too (although she does not always realise it). We have a lot of laughs but we also have sobering moments, and that is what it is all about.
It is not all about laughing and having good times. You can have those with anyone, even strangers. What matters is if you can take the good with the bad. Can you be there for your friend when they are not at their best? Can you tell your friend what's on your mind without fear of judgement? Can you handle harsh advice from your friend? Are you able to give hard advice to your friend? If you can be all of you and they are still by your side, hold onto them for a very long time.
Several of my longest running friendships, I realised, have been with people who are considered outcasts, hurt souls, those who have been marginalised.
There is one person in my life whom I can count to always put a smile on my face. Let's call him "Jack Mcfarland" lol
Then there is "Karin Walker". The rich socialite queen who irritates us all sometimes but we cannot live without her.
These are some of my real friends, my roots. Those that I wish I will have for the rest of my life.
Friends come and friends go. Longevity should never be the yardstick of a friendship. There have been people in my life whom I have known since birth yet our relationship never progressed more than a tenth of some of the ones I have now. Some people are just meant to be in your life for a season. They are meant to teach you one thing and then move on. If you can learn to accept that fact then you will learn to appreciate the ones that matter.
I suppose this is dedicated to those who have experienced the best and the worst of me and through it all chose to stick by me.
Relationships are fragile. They can take a lifetime to build and they can be ruined in a second. Treasure your friends.
They are your chosen family.
Peace. Love. Happiness.
Friendships have always been a tricky thing for me. I don't easily make them, because I don't easily trust, but when I do I give my everything. Like most things in my life if I do something I do it all out. "Go big or go home".
I started thinking about the really profound friendships I have had in my life. Those which are now lost and those who still remain.
The longest one is with one of my closest friends. One of the roots in the tree of my life. We have been friends for over 15 years. There have been ups and downs. Major ones, but still loyalty remains. I suppose it stems from us both being outcasts. One of the peculiarities of our friendship is that we can go weeks without speaking with or seeing each other and yet when we do it is like no time has passed at all. We recently went through a period of 6 months without speaking and yet when we spoke after that it was like we were the two nerds again back in high school talking a whole bunch of rubbish and laughing our heads off at out silly stupid jokes only we understand. That is a true friendship.
I have a sneaky way of measuring the depth of my friendships. I believe that if you can sit in silence with someone without being uncomfortable at all then you have a true friend at your side. I have made a lot of people uncomfortable by doing this and was fun seeing them squirm in the silence but try as I might they never turned out to be good friends at all.
Another is one I consider to be one of my best friends. We shall call her "Grace Adler". We knew each other for a while before we became friends. Funnily enough I can't really recall how our friendship started but one thing I know for sure is that I do not think that it is gonna end soon. She is one of the most real people I have ever met and one of the strongest too (although she does not always realise it). We have a lot of laughs but we also have sobering moments, and that is what it is all about.
It is not all about laughing and having good times. You can have those with anyone, even strangers. What matters is if you can take the good with the bad. Can you be there for your friend when they are not at their best? Can you tell your friend what's on your mind without fear of judgement? Can you handle harsh advice from your friend? Are you able to give hard advice to your friend? If you can be all of you and they are still by your side, hold onto them for a very long time.
Several of my longest running friendships, I realised, have been with people who are considered outcasts, hurt souls, those who have been marginalised.
There is one person in my life whom I can count to always put a smile on my face. Let's call him "Jack Mcfarland" lol
Then there is "Karin Walker". The rich socialite queen who irritates us all sometimes but we cannot live without her.
These are some of my real friends, my roots. Those that I wish I will have for the rest of my life.
Friends come and friends go. Longevity should never be the yardstick of a friendship. There have been people in my life whom I have known since birth yet our relationship never progressed more than a tenth of some of the ones I have now. Some people are just meant to be in your life for a season. They are meant to teach you one thing and then move on. If you can learn to accept that fact then you will learn to appreciate the ones that matter.
I suppose this is dedicated to those who have experienced the best and the worst of me and through it all chose to stick by me.
Relationships are fragile. They can take a lifetime to build and they can be ruined in a second. Treasure your friends.
They are your chosen family.
Peace. Love. Happiness.
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